3/28/11 (continued)
This afternoon in my devotions I was reading out of 1 Corinthians. I read chapter 2 and 3, and it was in chapter three, that something spoke to me.
I read verse 6 which is as follows.
I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase.
Then I read on...
1Cr 3:7 So then neither is he that planteth any thing, neither he that watereth; but God that giveth the increase.
8 Now he that planteth and he that watereth are one: and every man shall receive his own reward according to his own labour.
9 For we are labourers together with God: ye are God's husbandry, ye are God's building.
10 According to the grace of God which is given unto me, as a wise masterbuilder, I have laid the foundation, and another buildeth thereon. But let every man take heed how he buildeth thereupon.
11 For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ.
I love this passage of scripture and I love what it means.
I LOVE how God works.
As I was struggling on this day and searching out the heart of God, this was the passage He lead me too.
When I first read it, I thought, I really have a job to do.
I want to plant, I want to help water. I want to see God give the increase. This is what I live for. I want to be a part of the ministry of the Lord. And as the verses go on and talk about how we are laborers together with God, I got encouraged. I'm working with and for the Lord.
He is doing a great work, and I'm helping. I love the thought of that.
It only takes one person to plant the seed.
It takes one person to lay the foundation.
And from that, something beautiful can grow.
Something beautiful can start building up.
I got encouraged as I read, but it was what happened later in the day that really got to me.
I received a message from a sweet friend of Rick and mine. She wrote to me and told me some really amazing news. (It's wonderful how God gives you exactly what you need when you need it. =)
Her sweet husband and her came to Maddie Grace's funeral back on 1/11. She said that since, God has really been working and convicting her husbands heart. Yesterday,(Sunday morning) she said that her Husband went to the altar and got saved. He got SAVED! =)
These were some of the words she typed me, and I just had to share...
"God laid it on my heart to share this with you as one more precious soul will be able to see Maddie once again in Heaven. Praise the Lord!! I truly believe that your sweet baby girl played a huge part in him (her husband) coming to know the Lord. I believe that God used that night to plant the first seed and has been working in my Husband's life ever since."
(CHILLS)
My daughter... the missionary.... And the gardener... =)
Isn't it amazing that she used the words, "plant the first seed."
Wow, I can see God's hand in that! I was just reading about it from His Word earlier on this day.
He is so good!
I'm in tears as I type.
I know that Maddie's little life will continue to work like this.
I know that Maddie's ministry will continue for years to come. God has such a great plan. Heaven is gaining more soul's for eternity. We have such a job to do.
I will just keep on planting and watering, and telling Maddie's story.
And we will watch as God gives the increase... What a beautiful work.
Praise the Lord!!!
March 30, 2011
God is faithful...
3/28/11(Monday)
I woke up this morning feeling pretty sad, and I am doing my best to have a positive attitude today.
Some mornings I just don't feel happy. I guess that's okay. I know I have so much to be thankful for, and I am, but I really just miss Maddie.
I walked by her room again this morning, and for the first time, I pulled her door almost closed. I guess for a while, I felt like I was trying to shut her out if I closed the door, but I'm realizing as more time goes by the sadder I get seeing it empty. I just wish she could have enjoyed it. =(
We put her little bassinet in there after she passed away, and everytime I walk by and see it with her little blanket drapped over the side, I want to cry. I want to walk in there and pick her up out of there, and rock her and kiss her. I just feel like it's a constant reminder and it breaks my heart.
So, as I pulled the door (almost) closed, I thought, Okay Lord, I need you.
He then reminded of the message I heard preached on Sunday, God is faithful.
God is faithful.
As I sat in the service Sunday morning with my sweet Husband and family, knowing that we all still have broken hearts, I was thankful.
I'm thankful for the Bible and for the words that my Pastor preached.
God is faithful.
When my heart is overwhelmed and I don't feel like I can possibly go on another day, God is faithful. He loves me, He sent His Son for me. He saved me.
There have most definately been times in my life that I have been let down. There have been times I have definitely been dissapointed and hurt. But one thing I know for sure is this...
What God says He will do, He will.
The promises He gives, He will fulfill.
God is faithful.
When I struggle and fail, and I do so often. I know that God is still faithful. So often, I am reminded to cling to the One who can carry me through.
Rick and I have truly seen God's faithful hand everyday since January the 8th. He has taken care of us and given us strength every single day. We are still moving forward, every day. He has felt our pain in the night, and sent comfort to us. He has held us up during the day and given us the strength to go on. He has loved us as we hurt and He has hurt with us.
I truly believe that.
I have been asked a few times since Madeline passed away, why I wasn't mad at God for taking my daughter. I told them the same thing I said at Maddie's funeral that night. He allowed me to have her and love her. He blessed me with carrying her through my pregnancy. He let me feel complete love for 2 days. How can I be mad about that?
We prayed for her and asked God for her, and He gave her to us. Then when we found out we were expecting, we gave Her back to Him. I do not regret that. I never will.
I believe that the children we are given is at the mercy of God. And if He decides to give us more, which we are praying He does, we will be grateful. He knows. He is faithful.
For that, we will be forever grateful. I will never question the hand of God. He knows all things.
I can't see all the reasons now. I don't know why Maddie needed to go to Heaven in less than two days of life here, but God does. And as I've stated before, she served her life's purpose in that short amount of time.
I honestly am in awe so often of the way that her little life has touched people. It has been so amazing.
I still receive letters and messages, every day. I am so thankful that her little life will be remembered and used for many years to come. I'm so proud of her.
God has been faithful.
He has helped Rick and I to move forward, never forgetting, always remembering, but using this trial for the good.
Our goal is to be faithful to the Lord, the way He has been to us.
I fail so often to be what I need to be, and I feel like since I've been going through this trial, it's much easier to fail. And I could say, well, I have an excuse because of the pain and heartache I've endured.
But, I feel like right now, God can really use me more. He's using Maddie's story to do so...
I want Him to get the glory while I am going through this hard time.
If the glory goes anywhere but to Him, it's going to the wrong place. I know this.
One thing the Pastor mentioned that really resonated with me was this.
Our jobs expect us to be faithful.
Our spouses expect us to be faithful.
Everything that we do in this life, we should do fully and to the best of our ability with faithfulness.
God wants us to be faithful too.
God wants us to be faithful to Him and this is what I'm striving to do.
So, as He is so faithful to me, my prayer is that I can be faithful to Him. He is God, and He is good.
1 Corinthians 1:9
(9) God is faithful, by whom ye were called unto the fellowship of his Son Jesus Christ our Lord.
Sweet Maddie Grace on 1/7/11
I woke up this morning feeling pretty sad, and I am doing my best to have a positive attitude today.
Some mornings I just don't feel happy. I guess that's okay. I know I have so much to be thankful for, and I am, but I really just miss Maddie.
I walked by her room again this morning, and for the first time, I pulled her door almost closed. I guess for a while, I felt like I was trying to shut her out if I closed the door, but I'm realizing as more time goes by the sadder I get seeing it empty. I just wish she could have enjoyed it. =(
We put her little bassinet in there after she passed away, and everytime I walk by and see it with her little blanket drapped over the side, I want to cry. I want to walk in there and pick her up out of there, and rock her and kiss her. I just feel like it's a constant reminder and it breaks my heart.
So, as I pulled the door (almost) closed, I thought, Okay Lord, I need you.
He then reminded of the message I heard preached on Sunday, God is faithful.
God is faithful.
As I sat in the service Sunday morning with my sweet Husband and family, knowing that we all still have broken hearts, I was thankful.
I'm thankful for the Bible and for the words that my Pastor preached.
God is faithful.
When my heart is overwhelmed and I don't feel like I can possibly go on another day, God is faithful. He loves me, He sent His Son for me. He saved me.
There have most definately been times in my life that I have been let down. There have been times I have definitely been dissapointed and hurt. But one thing I know for sure is this...
What God says He will do, He will.
The promises He gives, He will fulfill.
God is faithful.
When I struggle and fail, and I do so often. I know that God is still faithful. So often, I am reminded to cling to the One who can carry me through.
Rick and I have truly seen God's faithful hand everyday since January the 8th. He has taken care of us and given us strength every single day. We are still moving forward, every day. He has felt our pain in the night, and sent comfort to us. He has held us up during the day and given us the strength to go on. He has loved us as we hurt and He has hurt with us.
I truly believe that.
I have been asked a few times since Madeline passed away, why I wasn't mad at God for taking my daughter. I told them the same thing I said at Maddie's funeral that night. He allowed me to have her and love her. He blessed me with carrying her through my pregnancy. He let me feel complete love for 2 days. How can I be mad about that?
We prayed for her and asked God for her, and He gave her to us. Then when we found out we were expecting, we gave Her back to Him. I do not regret that. I never will.
I believe that the children we are given is at the mercy of God. And if He decides to give us more, which we are praying He does, we will be grateful. He knows. He is faithful.
For that, we will be forever grateful. I will never question the hand of God. He knows all things.
I can't see all the reasons now. I don't know why Maddie needed to go to Heaven in less than two days of life here, but God does. And as I've stated before, she served her life's purpose in that short amount of time.
I honestly am in awe so often of the way that her little life has touched people. It has been so amazing.
I still receive letters and messages, every day. I am so thankful that her little life will be remembered and used for many years to come. I'm so proud of her.
God has been faithful.
He has helped Rick and I to move forward, never forgetting, always remembering, but using this trial for the good.
Our goal is to be faithful to the Lord, the way He has been to us.
I fail so often to be what I need to be, and I feel like since I've been going through this trial, it's much easier to fail. And I could say, well, I have an excuse because of the pain and heartache I've endured.
But, I feel like right now, God can really use me more. He's using Maddie's story to do so...
I want Him to get the glory while I am going through this hard time.
If the glory goes anywhere but to Him, it's going to the wrong place. I know this.
One thing the Pastor mentioned that really resonated with me was this.
Our jobs expect us to be faithful.
Our spouses expect us to be faithful.
Everything that we do in this life, we should do fully and to the best of our ability with faithfulness.
God wants us to be faithful too.
God wants us to be faithful to Him and this is what I'm striving to do.
So, as He is so faithful to me, my prayer is that I can be faithful to Him. He is God, and He is good.
1 Corinthians 1:9
(9) God is faithful, by whom ye were called unto the fellowship of his Son Jesus Christ our Lord.
March 29, 2011
Being a blessing...
3/26/11
Well, we seemed to have recovered from being sick for the most part. It was a LONG week of sickness, and I'm so very thankful that everyone is finally feeling better.
We stayed in Friday night to give the boys time to recuperate. They were still both running fevers, so it was nice enjoying family time, and snuggling them on the couch.
My boys are so snuggly when they are sick, and are definitely Mama's boys. I'm not complaining about this at all. I love it.
After we put them to bed, I was struggling and was really missing Madeline.
My mind won't let me forget those moments I had pictured for so many months. I always do feel like someone is constantly missing, and she is.
I just wish she could have been home with us that night, making sweet memories with us on the couch.
So, as I pondered these things, I was having a hard time.
I was a little bummed too, because I was supposed to have gone to a Ladies retreat with my sweet friend Jenny that day. Since the boys and I weren't feeling well, I couldn't go.
I knew that it would have been good for me to hear the speakers and their stories, so I was a upset that I couldn't make it. I hadn't really been out of the house all week and was really looking forward to going, and being encouraged.
On her way home, Jenny called me to check on me and tell me how it went.
I went upstairs to talk to her, and I completely broke down. I was telling her how much I was missing Maddie and how I just wanted to hold her again. I was sobbing on the phone.
Jenny completely understood, she loved Maddie too and being the Mommy of two little girls, it really hits close to home for her.
Jenny and I have been friends since freshman year of college. We were in each others weddings and have been there when each other's babies were born.
She was by my side at each of my boy's births, and she was with me when Maddie Grace was born. She took the video of everyone giving "well wishes" and caught some amazing footage of my sweet girl in her first moments of life. I'm so happy that she took that video and that I have it to cherish.
Mine and Jenny's husbands are best friends too, and we have so many wonderful memories of the four of us. (and if you count her girls and my boys, the 8 of us :)
Nick has been such a blessing and rock for Rick in the last 2 1/2 months, and we honestly feel so blessed to have good friends like them in our lives. They are the best.
After letting me cry, Jenny encouraged me.
She was telling me about some of the things the speaker was saying that night. She told me about all the trials she had been through in her life.
She met her husband in bible college, and after two years he cheated on her. They restored their relationship and after 10 years of marriage, they were unsuccessful getting pregnant. They looked into adoption at this point and were going to adopt a child, but the birth mom changed her mind after the baby was born. Then they finally adopted a set of twins, born at 27 weeks old. They were 2 lbs each. Three weeks after the little boy was born, he had to have heart surgery.
So, as you can see, she had quite a story.
Then, Jenny said that she said this.... (and I'm paraphrasing here) When we are able to take the focus off of ourselves, and pour our lives into someone else, and mentor that person; then we can be a blessing.
We, in return are the ones who are blessed, and this will lessen our own hurt, and the problems we are going through...
Wow! What great advice from a lady who had been through so much. Her words were so encouraging, and so true.
I know that whenever I'm out and about and busy with someone else, I'm not constantly thinking about my pain and sorrow. Especially on Sundays, when I'm busy teaching my girls and pouring everything God has given me into them, I'm happy. I feel blessed.
I've decided to try to make this a goal in my weekly routine. I'm going to try to just pour myself in others, including (you) who are reading here now.
I want to be a blessing, and in return, I know I will feel blessed.
There is no greater place to put an investment, than into someone else's life. Especially into the eternity of someone else's life. I want to point people towards the Lord and towards Heaven. I have so much waiting for me there. I want others to know that they have the same.
If I can spend my days trying to encourage and uplift someone else, then I'm sure I will feel good in return. I always feel good when I'm doing something for someone else.
I mean, yes, I could totally throw myself a pretty good pity party ever day, and many of you would probably come to it for me. =)
But, I don't want to live my life like that. Maddie Grace is happy, and I want to be too.
So, today my prayer is that the Lord will make me a blessing in the lives' of others. I want God to use me to bless someone else's life, and I hope that He will.
Genesis 12:2 And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing:
Jenny, Maddie and I at my Baby Shower
Waiting for Maddie Grace to arrive
Little Miss Maddie Grace. I wish I had a picture of Jenny holding her.
Make me a Blessing
Make me a blessing, make me a blessing;
Out of my life may Jesus shine.
Make me a blessing, O Saviour I pray,
Make me a blessing to someone today.
Tell the sweet story of Christ and His love,
Tell of His pow'r to forgive;
Others will trust Him if only you prove
True every moment you live.
Make me a blessing, make me a blessing;
Out of my life may Jesus shine.
Make me a blessing, O Saviour I pray,
Make me a blessing to someone today.
Give as 'twas given to you in your need,
Love as the Master loved you;
Be to the helpless a helper indeed,
Unto your mission be true.
Make me a blessing, make me a blessing;
Out of my life may Jesus shine.
Well, we seemed to have recovered from being sick for the most part. It was a LONG week of sickness, and I'm so very thankful that everyone is finally feeling better.
We stayed in Friday night to give the boys time to recuperate. They were still both running fevers, so it was nice enjoying family time, and snuggling them on the couch.
My boys are so snuggly when they are sick, and are definitely Mama's boys. I'm not complaining about this at all. I love it.
After we put them to bed, I was struggling and was really missing Madeline.
My mind won't let me forget those moments I had pictured for so many months. I always do feel like someone is constantly missing, and she is.
I just wish she could have been home with us that night, making sweet memories with us on the couch.
So, as I pondered these things, I was having a hard time.
I was a little bummed too, because I was supposed to have gone to a Ladies retreat with my sweet friend Jenny that day. Since the boys and I weren't feeling well, I couldn't go.
I knew that it would have been good for me to hear the speakers and their stories, so I was a upset that I couldn't make it. I hadn't really been out of the house all week and was really looking forward to going, and being encouraged.
On her way home, Jenny called me to check on me and tell me how it went.
I went upstairs to talk to her, and I completely broke down. I was telling her how much I was missing Maddie and how I just wanted to hold her again. I was sobbing on the phone.
Jenny completely understood, she loved Maddie too and being the Mommy of two little girls, it really hits close to home for her.
Jenny and I have been friends since freshman year of college. We were in each others weddings and have been there when each other's babies were born.
She was by my side at each of my boy's births, and she was with me when Maddie Grace was born. She took the video of everyone giving "well wishes" and caught some amazing footage of my sweet girl in her first moments of life. I'm so happy that she took that video and that I have it to cherish.
Mine and Jenny's husbands are best friends too, and we have so many wonderful memories of the four of us. (and if you count her girls and my boys, the 8 of us :)
Nick has been such a blessing and rock for Rick in the last 2 1/2 months, and we honestly feel so blessed to have good friends like them in our lives. They are the best.
After letting me cry, Jenny encouraged me.
She was telling me about some of the things the speaker was saying that night. She told me about all the trials she had been through in her life.
She met her husband in bible college, and after two years he cheated on her. They restored their relationship and after 10 years of marriage, they were unsuccessful getting pregnant. They looked into adoption at this point and were going to adopt a child, but the birth mom changed her mind after the baby was born. Then they finally adopted a set of twins, born at 27 weeks old. They were 2 lbs each. Three weeks after the little boy was born, he had to have heart surgery.
So, as you can see, she had quite a story.
Then, Jenny said that she said this.... (and I'm paraphrasing here) When we are able to take the focus off of ourselves, and pour our lives into someone else, and mentor that person; then we can be a blessing.
We, in return are the ones who are blessed, and this will lessen our own hurt, and the problems we are going through...
Wow! What great advice from a lady who had been through so much. Her words were so encouraging, and so true.
I know that whenever I'm out and about and busy with someone else, I'm not constantly thinking about my pain and sorrow. Especially on Sundays, when I'm busy teaching my girls and pouring everything God has given me into them, I'm happy. I feel blessed.
I've decided to try to make this a goal in my weekly routine. I'm going to try to just pour myself in others, including (you) who are reading here now.
I want to be a blessing, and in return, I know I will feel blessed.
There is no greater place to put an investment, than into someone else's life. Especially into the eternity of someone else's life. I want to point people towards the Lord and towards Heaven. I have so much waiting for me there. I want others to know that they have the same.
If I can spend my days trying to encourage and uplift someone else, then I'm sure I will feel good in return. I always feel good when I'm doing something for someone else.
I mean, yes, I could totally throw myself a pretty good pity party ever day, and many of you would probably come to it for me. =)
But, I don't want to live my life like that. Maddie Grace is happy, and I want to be too.
So, today my prayer is that the Lord will make me a blessing in the lives' of others. I want God to use me to bless someone else's life, and I hope that He will.
Genesis 12:2 And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing:
Make me a Blessing
Make me a blessing, make me a blessing;
Out of my life may Jesus shine.
Make me a blessing, O Saviour I pray,
Make me a blessing to someone today.
Tell the sweet story of Christ and His love,
Tell of His pow'r to forgive;
Others will trust Him if only you prove
True every moment you live.
Make me a blessing, make me a blessing;
Out of my life may Jesus shine.
Make me a blessing, O Saviour I pray,
Make me a blessing to someone today.
Give as 'twas given to you in your need,
Love as the Master loved you;
Be to the helpless a helper indeed,
Unto your mission be true.
Make me a blessing, make me a blessing;
Out of my life may Jesus shine.
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